fötter day

fötter day

you can hear the…

suburbia chime, zirconia vertebrae. pearly white spine
glass thrown in stone houses, regular suburbia night
whirring, rewind. chronicled childhood in olive drab paint
monocle glass. wormwood and bottles of shawshank. 
dissolute solitude, wanderer who wallows in maze
en route. delay for tomorrow. never promised today  
virgin diary. anne frank. marie curie disease
tinture of rainbow, even if the distance is blurry to me
he who knows the way to zihuatenejo.
furlough father. demand you to die when i say so
26 pesos what’s left in your wallet 
lint and mothball, merryland. plexiglass omelette. 
laundromat arcade quarter exchange 
2 o clock shadow of death and follicle strain 
these boulders were supposed to be gone when i got here 
you shouldered me off. sunday morning penny loafer with frost 
social commentary gabriel-lucifer talk
metamucil, retrograde. jupiter star
bolivian roast, oblivion, and a toast goes to mars
you hold my hand; but i don’t even know who you are 
shout at me when indoors, but whisper weak when afar 
im so close to eroding, skin growth, barely a scar
in my house; the big wolf. lungs pulse til’ exhaustion 
i read a suicide note from the ghost in my closet
i dont know, if he knows if this apartment is haunted 
by patriarchal pettiness, reminiscent negligent heart
maleficent maligned distant/forgot insidious offspring
with ammunition in their lips, that keep you off guard
feel the metacarpal love letters til your fingers fall off
once you step out the door, you hear the wooden creak in the floor
fell asleep at the creek daydreaming before 
everytime before bed i hear footsteps coming from deep
and i hide my in my closet, until they delete
REM hits me while I’m counting my sheep
counting rosary beads for every step wolf takes towards me
like neighborhood freeze tag, counting to 3
dysfunctional beings, huffing in suburbia breeze 
i know that i know nothing is in love when i speak 
into denizens, the medicine cabinet only creaks 
when you close it and i haven’t heard it in weeks 
form bourbon, to curtains burnt at the seams 
I’m so close to being the opposite of perfect, i scream
what emerges, a bird sits perched in a tree
what alerts him is
suburbia breeze 

to miss P

it was a matter of why. statuesque beauty over vodka and wine 
hourglass figurine. when you come around it becomes tough to tell time
seductress stolichnaya. brunette, bridal, bohemian
it’s cruel how without even trying you leave me 
in a state of dreams where I’m hardly breathing
at the Gala. a seamstress couldn’t replicate your body shape
you look awfully familiar….it’s been awhile since i’ve been in this hypnotic state. 
eyes are pools of island bays, emphasized by shine of geysers
a vivifying type of way, to kiss your lips would feel like fire 
to put them out, i’d have meet your jewels of diamond lakes
only a fool could deny, this muse that emphasizes grace
electrifying taste. Prostovian princess with a crystallizing gaze
accent so alluring, the way you pronounce your words overarched
i could feel your tongue twist cherry stems in my heart 

delicate skin: negative print 

delicate skin: negative print 

who’s barely  

intact. two hundred thousand nails puncture veins in my back
whether not they’re human or metal remains to be asked 
yellowpages. your name severs sapience. saps
like heavens angels. vessels fray then collapse
lord father, elevate us. why’m i so fixated on the past
separate fact from fiction. eradicate my relapse
rehabilitation at its fanciest. pinky out to brush ash from cigar 
if love lasts then it’s farce. my last love seems so far
may i have the pleasure of introduction without it seeming covert
or open my mouth to talk something while we’re eating dessert
feelings deserted you, conservative dealings in cursive 
from the telekinesis to hypnosis, i barely feel what your words meant 
sink your teeth delicately into the flesh that’s corroding
if you feel that it’s urgent…please feel free to unload
it’s not you, or me, my dear. the psychosis
developments fleeting. camera obscura bleeding negative print
the lightest exposure came from your chest 
was it a dark heart or  
delicate skin
delicate skin 


i feel 

so disconnected. pictures of stars are trillions of seconds old
heliocentric. we spend our time wishing we could revisit a setting
i could see it in decimals. each dot a pause in a sentence
hold my hand, avalanche. bring me the check when you’re finished
mezzanine at the theater, velvet seamstress, madam Gutierrez
que romántico eres. carve my heart, au revoir mi mujeres
i spend the evening in tears, like its common procedure
every droplet is a sonnet, every water stream a cathedral 
where people gather, or they scatter, whether it be former or latter
and they pray to their jesus, and i pray cause i have to
there’s order in madness, there’s hope in the sadness
like a volcano that’s dormant or a star going dwarf 
that’s just part of it all, endorphin hull, heart to starboard 
when we talk, disembark, your lips presses mute
mrs vixen, so dissolute, pixel perfect, lipstick in blue
vigil for a virgin, vicissitude, picture me as i picture you
don’t listen when you talk, kiss your ears when you moan 
so petite, heavenly, pour the shot-glass, and reload 
monkey see, monkeys cheek perfect on your ocular bone 
cause to me, you’re as sweet, as strawberry doses
through the darkness, on horses. cobweb corrosion 
cut through the bark with my sword. I’m sorry my forest
double entendre. knot in my throat. not even sober
harlequin clone. dark knight imposter, I’m already joker 
early onset alzheimer’s, i forget what you told me
along the lines, were ostracized, but we’re all really lonely 
wave down a taxi, drop me off on the corner. call me when you’re home
wait for me at the door, don’t leave me alone 
lay down – the house spins. false belief, methadone.
marmalade, cherry tree, cigar leaf, telephone 
qu’est-ce que c’est¿ fasten seatbelt while seated, mi amor 
stand to applause, an encore, such a valid response
you’d barely feel it 
you moved on, so very far. 
i checked my bags at the door. viewed the empty decorum
sit at the bar. recount the experience
watch the only bag revolve round’ the oval
let me fall. we should want what we fear. 


i get along without you

i get along without you
it was only
a second. it felt more armageddon, a source of dependence
my very core was augmented. no force, just indebted to pain
embedded; the flow descending in waves
chakra, like flames, no position, no direction. unphased.
see, most of what i felt was descriptions. captions in italics
handpicked basket of malice. last resort love-lust. i decide first
hard to describe a picture with nine hundred ninety nine words
inarguable. we didn’t argue, just cut you off to yell in your face
you could feel the dismay. built up incendiary droplets of sage
rose petals kissed the spots on your face, dynamite dulcet decay.
vitalize vital signs, ultra displacement.
i memorized your voice so estranged
umbra vibrations. ultraviolet rays touched the recliner in gray
i went on for an hour. armchair therapy. you sat in your bed
tears rolling down my cheek, as i let you know it wasn’t okay
how i felt, how unlucky i was.
how stars realigned themselves on that day
perfect memory tenses. serial lover. in bed with the zodiac killer
i murdered your obsession with star gazing once my sign became unfamiliar
i get along without you perfectly, darling
i’ve forgotten you, just like i should have, regardless. 
hear your laughs in whispers of wind, details i thought i’ve forgotten
any scintilla, bit into the apple that brings you into my garden
songs that played in the background of trysts we partook in
are nothing, just tunes that became aloof and out of tune 
a fool for thinking, autumn would sing to me during decembers departure
devilish palm touch, crackling firewood in rhythm with heartbeats
dwindling darkness, you’d hear the goosebumps raise if you listen in softly
killing me. hardly.
I get along without you, perfectly darling
of course I do
except perhaps in autumn, but I should
never think of autumn
for that would shatter my heart in two

chemical beachhhh

it’ll be over soon (im so weak)

i dont know what to say. that’s all ive been saying of late.
blurry backdrop, urban aperture frame.
thorough blacktop, burrow the hallowing pain
delicate language left footprints on chemical beach.
.. ive still got sand in my car
talked on a blanket in vitamin forest with blanketed speech
soapbox. being in a straitjacket has just helped me escape.
it’s not that im crazy, i just dont know who else is insane.
caffeinated delays. adrenal obstruction, dilated pupil -people seduction
fetal position. let’s meet at a funeral. don’t keep in touch – its
fall asleep in the morning, methamphetamine when its dark
mention me when you talk. give yourself to me when you whisper
affectionate’s affecting me. affections kisses led to blisters
perception means perceptive thinkers. you want to go but people never let you
fatigue. synthesizers audible blast. stereo headphone milieu
sweet nothings – mean nothing, you took your coffee black
capricorn your zodiac, maelstrom the storm in a bottle cap
i gave you space, you gave me freedom
if that were our slogan we could put a flag on the moon
poisonous daydreams, falling asleep with you when im wide awake
cyanide capsule is like biting a bullet
how do i life live to the fullest. backstroke the tidal wave
chemical beach

9/04/2016 – 1:32 A.M – You.are.here.

9/04/2016 – 1:32 A.M – You.are.here.

I’m sorry

there’s a reason I’m like this. lapidary diamond destruction
cut out your aortic value. set aside the eruption
volcanic assembly. in the midst of a powerless strain
it isn’t malaise. the road less travelled is travelled the same
mapped out distinction. we only talk when there’s nothing to say
you are here. we are there. it hurts, but okay
perforated perfection, razorbladed ventricle phase
take an exit. no, take a breath. pulmonary affection display
but we don’t breathe anymore.
tensions rising, adrenal gland, sinus secretion
no gasps of air in-between kisses, just sighs of relief
stethoscope camaraderie. departure is now tearful at best
decode the morse of your heartbeat with an ear to your chest
but it doesn’t matter anymore
you ruined my interpretation of love
she used to walk by the lake and avoid the watery tide
now when it rains I let you walk in puddles with stride
tablecloth linen. Chevrolet wagon window fingerprint stain
hers clouded the same area,l. Cinderella silhouette paint
we’ve been here before, I’ll say it again. I’ll say it forever
your silence let me know we weren’t together
delicate language, I kept you in Davy Jones locker
binary code sonder, bystanders looked at us argue
I don’t know. you were my first.
ethereal consumption, diluted diversion
I don’t know if it’s you or when you put me on mute. and there’s bourbon
you are here. no you aren’t. you’re just in my bloodstream
so when I run away from my past…
well you are here. disenfranchised. who’s gonna pay tribute
desenfenada. desperado. I hate to end it like this. to be continued